I used to think of summer as a time of rest and relaxation, a time where I can forget all my worries and go-with-the-flow. But somewhere in time that changed. I began filling up my summer days with anything and everything because I always had to be doing something. It was never okay for me to sit and rest in God. Last summer I learned the importance of rest the hard way. After spending nine-months in New Zealand ministering, I returned back to the States, had about 2 weeks rest visiting my family and supporters then I was off to Georgia again to help with the training camps. By no means was I forced to help send out other missionaries, but it was something I enjoyed doing and felt like I could be used best that way. The time came and my Ambassador team finally arrived. It was then I realized that I probably should have taken more time to rest.
After an intense week at training camp, getting to know each other on the team and doing many team builders, we were heading off to Swaziland. Our time there started off a little slow, but ministry was upon us everywhere. My problem was that I was so exhausted I had nothing to pour out to the students on my team. Waking up in the morning became a time I dreaded (more than usual) and overall, I felt like I had let my team down. I hadn’t spent the time needed resting in the Lord to pour back out. I got sick halfway through the trip which didn’t make things easier. I lost my voice and was quite miserable. The trip ended and we were back to Atlanta for debrief. I was getting sicker and all I wanted to do was sleep. I didn’t want to talk about the good and the bad from the trip. I wanted medicine…
So here I am again, preparing to lead another group of students back to Africa. Even thought I didn’t just return from nine months on the field and a summer of training camp in the Georgia heat, I have still found it difficult to rest in the Lord. There is always something that needs to be done, something more that needs my attention at this moment. If I am not at work then I am getting things together for my visa and trying to pack my life up in boxes again. The whole process can be quite overwhelming. This past week I was more or less forced to rest. I went to the metroplex with only my car, no computer, clothes or phone charger. I ended up having to stay there for 4 days. All I could do was rest. What a blessing.
Now that I am back in Abilene, life has to continue forward. I still have to be out of my apartment in three weeks and haven’t packed a thing. If you saw my room you would be very concerned for me. I have to continue working until I can no longer live in Abilene and then I’m off to visit supporters, family and friends before leaving life on hold in America once again. THis is doable indeed, but can be overwhelming unless I continue to lean on the Lord and rely on Him for my strength.
Relaxing with my New Zealand First Year Missionary team
